It’s here! And it arrived a couple of weeks ago. I know it’s getting close when one of my favorite commercials starts to air. I laugh at pretty much every single one of her commercials but I think this is my all-time favorite:
Now that black Friday is over, it’s officially on. Tis the Season people, Tis the Season. Let the games begin, the Christmas decorators, the Christmas music listeners and the Christmas dressers. I for one am going to take the easy road on decorating this year like these people:
Don’t get me wrong, I love the holidays and I love Christmas music, but when you have to start listening to it in October, it wears on you before the end of December. There’s only so many Christmas songs, doesn’t matter what genre you listen you, the songs are all the same. Wait until the first week of December and then have at it, but January 1 you better stop, I don’t want to hear it until February or someone’s losing a limb.
And now we get to the Christmas dressers. Oh, those poor, poor souls. I can be festive, but there’s “those” people, oh yeah, you know the ones, bells on their sweater, red and green socks, santa hats and candy canes in their pockets.
Speaking of bells, why do designers add them to sweaters, sweater vests and jean shirts? They’re always in a not so great spot. This also only encourages those people to shake…stuff….so they ring. All I can think about are strategically placed pasties that strippers wear. That’s not a good thought because getting out of that sweater that fit you in the 70’s and has been washed 40 times can’t be easy. The static it has to cause being pulled over your head could start an electrical fire.
Now let’s chat about santa hats. I bartend now and then and usually for the Holiday party I will be festive and wear a santa hat for a couple of hours, beyond that my head is sweating so bad I look like I should be sitting in a sauna. I’m sure you know the people who wear them for weeks and weeks. It’s like they’ve been waiting all year for this. Do you think these people wear that hat all year around in the comfort of their own home? Perhaps it’s some sort of fetish. Eww, I can’t believe I just went there.
Like I said, I am not ‘bah humbug’ but I believe some people have to get a grip on their ‘spirit’. Get involved, share the love, volunteer, buy lots of gifts, sing loud, decorate, but for the love of God, do not expect everyone to have the same ‘spirit’ you do. If you do expect that you’re likely to find bells where no one can hear them jingle and your santa hat being used as a muzzle.
Happy Holidays Everyone!